Rosh Hashana Vs. Thursday

Posted: September 7, 2010 in Life Musings
Tags: , , ,

September 7, 2010:

Yesterday I spent the day with my friends in the city. We walked around a bit, shopped a bit and even shared one of those big cupcakes from crumbs. We went for pizza and finished off the day with a movie. I came home, made lunch for today watched an episode of Weeds- I just finished Nip/Tuck so its time to shop for a new show- and went to bed.

I woke up today at 7 worked out for a bit, showered got dressed, ate a nice breakfast and went to work. And here I am.

And tonite I’ll probably chill with someone and then go to bed. Peacefully. Tomorrow I’ll eat the meal with my family, go to sleep and wake up around 11 on Thursday at which point I may or may not go hear Shofar. Or not. Either way. If I have my car ( I dont always have it) I may hit the beach. We’ll see. It’ll be a nice long 4 day vacation. On the heels of this past Labor Day weekend it’s a bit much- I need the money.

September 2008:

I went to second seder- a bit late cuz I had a wash to do- and got yelled at by my older Chavrusa when I told him why I was late. His argument? “If you had a plane to catch you wouldn’t have been late doing a wash”. True, but the Bais Medrash isn’t a plane. Doesn’t even have TV screens.

Anyway, I finished sitting across from my Gemara 3 hours later. Ran to get some greasy food from the Yeshiva’s cafeteria, and then ran back up for Maariv. I watched the people around me Daven like the world was coming to an end. Or at least what they imagined they’d be doing the day before their world may or may not come to an end.

Night seder, the time for a haircut. One of my good friends, a very Yeshivish but  totally awesome dude was amazing at giving haircuts. And he wouldn’t charge me. He was kidding around about giving me a mohawk, when someone form the hallway gave him a look, and said in as serious a voice as he can muster “Nu, Elul!”

The next morning, Erev Rosh Hashanah I forced myself to get out of bed, and with a feeling of some big burden and annoyance waiting for me over the next two days, Davened and said Hataras Nedarim very carefully. After all, can’t have all those horrible vows on me. Gives me a bad rap with God or something like that. Either way, you can be sure I was verrry careful with saying Hataras Nedarim.

The day would go by, I’d go to a shiur on the meaning of Mussaf, and generally walk around trying to feel serious.

The trying. I’ve just pinpointed it. There was so much trying. Trying to feel serious in September. Trying to be sad on Tish’a B’av. This time of year was always dreaded. I had to try to feel something that was difficult to feel, and feel guilty if I was unable to sit through a 8 hour davening. I did it, and it always went faster than I thought it would. Yet, the feeling was always mostly relief when it was all over. That happiness I always felt after yom kippur I had always contributed to feeling clean from sin, yet I think it was more about feelingintense relief that I didnt have to sit in shul 8 hours again for a whole year.

The contrast between the pre holiday days then and the days now are striking. So much more normal now, thank you very much.

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