Posts Tagged ‘brainwashing’

"In Memory of the 5 Family Members from the Settlement of Itamar Who Were Killed In Cold Blood"

Itamar Family Massacre. No need to post a link, because if you haven’t heard about it, shame on you. Not much to say. A animal goes in to the home of another person and slits the throats of both parents, a 3 month old baby and two other siblings.

As a child I used to ask my mom who gave the Nazis the “right” to kill people. I couldn’t understand that there were people who would violate the basic right of living on this planet – that is to respect anothers right to live.

Some things I can’t relate to, but I understand that there is an explanation. Say soldiers who won’t be afraid to die in battlefield, or maybe they will be, but nonetheless they’ll go out and fight. I can’t quite grasp how fear doesn’t overtake them, but then again, I’m not a soldier for that reason.  I understand that others are different than I may be, have different fears, hopes, dreams. Different things make them happy, fulfilled.

But certain keep on reading


For those of you who have trouble distinguishing between right and wrong, I offer you a visual representation... Any questions?

What defines something as wrong? Technically is there something wrong with banging a goat? It’s sick, disgusting and if I know anyone who did it I’d never talk to them again. But I think we define wrong as something that is out of our societal norms. let me give a few examples:

Oh, and please don’t leave comments telling me I’m making stereoypes etc. I’m not dumb. I’m well aware that most people in each segment probably don’t conform to those stereotypes, but that’s why they’re called stereotypes. Cuz that’s all it is. A stereoype, not reality.

Someone learning at R’ Avrohom Yehoshua: I know a bochur who’s mamesh messed up.  He learns more than a blatt every half year. He zicher doesn’t have right p’shat. He also has a second cousin that goes to YU.

Someone at R’ Tzvi: walking outside without hat and jacket, or coming to shiur after the door is locked…

Mir: Um…

BJJ girl: Marrying a boy from the other Brisk.

Hadar: Not listening to every word Mrs. Orenstein says.

All the Yeshivas with acronyms: AJ, TJ, OJ etc. : Listening to the Rabbis. A definite no-no.

YU: Disparaging The Rav, or referring to Rav Chaim when saying The Rav.

Upper West Side guy before 23: Having sex. So young to give up on finding a true mate.

Upper West Side guy after 23: Taking off your Yarmulka before walking into a bar. What’s there to be ashamed of. Leaving with a girl just shows your straight, that’s cool.

Chabad Dudes: You can do what you like, sleep with how ever many people you like, go to South America on a road trip and not keep Shabbos, but for God’s sake, don’t forget The Rebbe is big stuff, MaMesh.

Chabad Girls: Not liking hooka. A true chabad girl loves nothing more than to spend an evening with 8 mendys a 10 mushkys and 4 hookas.

Liberals, not necessarily Jewish: Not caring about the environment. Not caring about animals. Not being into art. Being homophobic. All terrible things.

Frat Boys: Being into art. So gay. Environment’s cool, anything resembling pop culture is bad.

Upper East Side Ladies: Most of them have plastic surgery once they hit 40 and are still ugly as sin, so being naturally beautiful is a crime. As is not having been married 3 times, robbing the guy of all his money each time. After all, they deserve SOME peace in their lives. Having a child that didn’t attend an ultra-elite prep school is taboo. Going out Saturday night with their lady friends and drinking martinis or vodka tonics is standard.

Hipsters: When they aren’t smoking up and can coherently think, it’s definitely wrong to not know what real music is. Real music is only something that just about all Americans never heard before. It also must have a vinyl edition somewhere out there. Deodorant is optional.

Hot Chanies: Not going to Miami for pesach is worse than the nail salon being closed when you get there. It’s wrong to be in NY over pesach. Very wrong.

This is the perspective of a modern orthodox friend of mine on the issue.
“The Frummy Who Finagled.”
I have firmly held the belief throughout my life that Judaism allows men and women to be able to be in contact with each other. The Torah, though it is male-dominated due to its writing in a time when the world was male-dominated, still has encounters in which unmarried, single man has spoken to and been attracted to unmarried woman, and, though at times it has had negative connotations, (like Dina- she may have flirted a little much with a prince. Bad idea Dina. You never flirt with an entitled teenager) the fact is that male and female conversation is quite common in the Bible, and in no instances does the Bible ban such encounter.
This disclaimer brings me to a CalmKallahs topic in which a Beis Yaakov girl, KEEP READING THERE’S MOAR!

So there’s this girl who wrote into the forum known as completely freaking out. She posted there the following:

“k-i am your typical frum girl in shidduchim-learning guys… i am freaking out and dont know what to do with myself… to make a long story short- i met a guy who i cannot marry- for a lot of reasons-but we liked each other so much and ended up talking, eventually meeting and got physical and recently we had sex. i am flipping out. i never talked to a guy b4 except on dates and dont no what to do…. will i still be able to marry a frum learning boy? am i ruined forever? in my heart i am still a frum bais yaakov girleven tho i know i messed up big time and have not told anyone about this and cant imagine doing so- no one would ever believe it so dont tell me to tell my parents. please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel so lost and hopeless!!!”

Let me preface by saying I completely understand the world in which she comes from. I came from there too. So it’s not her I think is amazingly lost, but her world. (And my past?)

It’s sad that a community exists that has such issues. A girl kKEEP READING THERE’S MOAR!

I’ve pasted an article from the NY times.

I guess Muslims, like Jews refuse to believe that one who leaves religion is a rational person. I’ve put that which I thought important or similar to the Jewish OTD, in blue.

QALQILYA, West Bank — It is hard to imagine that a dingy Internet cafe buzzing with flies in this provincial Palestinian town could have spawned a blogger who has angered the Muslim cyberworld by promoting atheism, composing spoofs of Koranic verses, skewering the lifestyle of the Prophet Muhammad and chatting online using the sarcastic Web name God Almighty.

But many people in Qalqilya seem convinced that this Facebook apostate is none other than a secretive young man who spent seven hours a day in the corner booth of a back-street hole-in-the-wall here. Until recently the man, Waleed Hasayin, in his mid-20s, led a relatively anonymous existence as an unemployed graduate in computer science who helped out a few hours a day at his father’s one-chair barber shop. Several acquaintances described him as an “ordinary guy” who prayed at the mosque on Fridays.

But since the end of October Mr. Hasayin has been detained at the local Palestinian Authority intelligence headquarters, suspected of being the blasphemous blogger who goes by the name Waleed al-Husseini. The case has drawn attention to thorny issues like freedom of expression in the Palestinian Authority, for which insulting religion is considered illegal, and the cultural collision between a conservative society and the Internet.

While Mr. Hasayin has won some admiration and support abroad — a Facebook group has formed in solidarity, along with several online petitions — others on Facebook are calling for his execution.

In his hometown, the reaction seems to be one of uniform fury. Many here say that if he does not repent, he should spend the rest of his life in jail.

“Everyone is a Muslim here, so everyone is against what he did,” said Alaa Jarar, 20, who described himself as not particularly pious. “People are mad at him and will not respect the Palestinian Authority if he is released. Maybe he is a Mossad agent working for Israel.”

Aside from his Facebook pages, which have now been deleted, Mr. Husseini, the online persona, also posted essays in Arabic on a blog called Noor al-Aqel (Enlightenment of Reason) and in English translation on Proud Atheist, identifying himself as “an atheist from Jerusalem — Palestine.”

The essays offer some relatively sophisticated arguments in a blunt and racy style. In one, titled “Why I left Islam,” Mr. Husseini wrote that Muslims “believe anyone who leaves Islam is an agent or a spy for a Western State, namely the Jewish State.”

He added, “They actually don’t get that people are free to think and believe in whatever suits them.”

He went on to describe the Islamic God as “a primitive, Bedouin and anthropomorphic God,” and Muhammad as “a sex maniac” who bent his own rules “to appease his voracious desire.”

It all seems a far cry from Qalqilya, a conservative low-rise town of more than 40,000 people where horse-drawn wagons plied the streets this week and the market was bustling ahead of the Muslim holiday marking the end of the annual pilgrimage in Mecca, Saudi Arabia.

The arrest of Mr. Hasayin has caused a sensation since it was first reported by the independent Palestinian news agency Maan. But there are also some who question whether he could have written all this material alone.

Mr. Hasayin’s father, Khaled, was reluctant to talk. Clearly upset and ashamed, he said that his son was in treatment and had been “bewitched” by a Tunisian woman he had met via Facebook.

Before shooing reporters out of his barber shop, where a framed Koranic verse hung on the wall above tubs of hair gel, he said that his son’s literary Arabic was not at a level where he could compose fake Koranic verses.

One relative of Mr. Hasayin said, “It is true he studied computers, but he is not a philosopher.”

At the local intelligence headquarters, officials seemed to be treading carefully. Speaking on the condition of anonymity because of the case’s potentially explosive nature — Salman Rushdie’s “Satanic Verses” led to riots and death threats in the 1980s, as did cartoons of Muhammad in the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten in 2005 — the officials said they could not release any details since Mr. Hasayin was still under interrogation. They said they had to act fairly and with sensitivity in case the suspicions proved false or exaggerated.

They said Mr. Hasayin had not been allowed any visitors and told them that he did not need a lawyer. Mr. Hasayin, they added, was being detained partly for his own protection.

Palestinian human rights groups in the West Bank have so far remained silent about Mr. Hasayin’s arrest. But Majed Arouri, a human rights expert in Ramallah, said he believed that the way in which Mr. Hasayin had been detained and his correspondence recorded “contradicts human rights principles and existing Palestinian laws” regarding individual privacy.

If Mr. Hasayin is to be tried, Mr. Arouri said, it would be according to a 1960 Jordanian law against defaming religion, still valid in the West Bank.

Some bloggers are already comparing Mr. Hasayin, or Mr. Husseini, to Kareem Amer, an Egyptian blogger who was sentenced in 2007 to four years’ imprisonment for insulting Islam and the Egyptian president.

At the Internet cafe that Mr. Hasayin frequented, youths played online billiards and looked at pictures of girls on a recent afternoon. The owner, Ahmed Abu Asab, said that six weeks ago he discovered that Mr. Hasayin was “not a regular client.”

Mr. Abu Asab had grown suspicious because Mr. Hasayin would not let anybody come close and see what he was working on. Mr. Abu Asab said: “At first I thought he was looking at pornographic sites and chatting with girls. That would be normal and none of my business.”

But Mr. Abu Asab said he used software that allowed him to check what the client was up to, and among other things, he came across the Facebook page on which Mr. Hasayin appeared to be speaking in the name of God. Mr. Abu Asab said that he and three friends knew what was going on and that “maybe somebody” informed the authorities.

Mr. Abu Asab kept copies of the pages, and Palestinian Authority officials came and downloaded the material. Next, they came for Mr. Hasayin, who asked for a moment to close what was on his screen.

People ask me why I’m training to be an actor. “Why am I interested?” is the question I get most often. The answer is simple. I like acting. I like having to get into an emotional state of mind that the lines call me to. I feel free from the constraints of the problems and issues I face in my own daily life while I throw myself into the mind of my character. And at the end I feel exhilarated, exhausted and happy.

But there are other reasons too. Firstly, its a way to incorporate a lifestyle into a career. Too many people I know are so caught up in making that last dollar, removing the last violation on their property, closing another deal, negotiating another contract, trading another stock, that they don’t have time to live.

For those who enjoy that, it’s a whole other ballpark. But many in those fields are in it just for the money. Somehow to be an actor opens up a world of other possibilities. There’s acting itself, which isn’t looked at like a chore by ANYONE in the business, otherwise they wouldn’t have chosen it. Then there’s also the events surrounding the profession. Obviously each stage of ones career has its own events, but even for a group of actors writing their own plays and producing them off-off Broadway, as I had a few friends do, there’s the promotion events, celebrations thrown by friends and family at every step of the way, post production parties. The list goes on. Just meeting up for dinner with a few actor friends and talking about possibilities for their next venture, or opportunities they haven’t yet employed as far as making connections or getting their name out there all become social events necessary to survive as an actor. Obviously as one advances, and begins acting for major networks, or moves past no-budget films, there are the screenings, premieres and the like. Similar in a way to someone raising investment capital who is always meeting others for business purposes, but unless the person doing business enjoys his profession, it will likely take over his life instead of being what life was about for him all along.

Another reason: I have always loved the spotlight. Stuck up? Maybe, but I’d love the recognition. Shallow I know. I’m just being honest.

And then there’s the potential money of course. I’d very much like to make my money as a professional, not as a business man. I’d like to do my thing, and get paid for it. Once I do my thing often enough, more opportunities come one’s way, and before you know it you can “accidentally” release a sex tape and become a national celebrity. Or maybe that’s only after you achieve celebrity status. Either way I’m not a girl, so sex tapes are out. Next.

But in all seriousness, I see my boss, a rich business man, and all he owns is a house and minivan. If I had the amount of money he had I’d own a yacht and 2 very nice homes on the coasts, for starters. I’d understand if he simpky weren’t interested in those things. But he’s gotta be interested in something. He’s the most boring person I’ve met, and everyone seems to have the same opinion of him. He has no interests. At all. What about it makes him like that? Is it religion? I’d venture to say so, feel free to disagree. I heard from an Israeli Chiloni coworker and his very not religious, very never was religious American girlfriend, that all the Big Boss talks about by his Shabbos meal is technical issues he has with the city in regards to his business. I mean, if you’re going to be boring because of your religion, at least be an extremist in regards to not speaking about business matters on Shabbos….just sayin’.

I have a friend who told me that “When I was a kid I begged my parents to let me go to acting school for classes but they didn’t let for Jewish reasons. But they said that I would be miserable.” That’s part of the reason I hate religion, they supress anything creative. ANYTHING. If I would’ve been a regular kid I would’ve  been a child actor. But I grew up without exposure to movies so barely knew what an actor was. From the moment I watched my first movie at a late age, my passion to get on camera grew. But life goes on, and I’ll do my best from here on out.

One thing I noticed is that religious people are very skeptical of my plans. Because their vision has been hammered and hammered narrower and narrower until we have religious girls whose life ambition is to support a husband in Kollel, work at an office job for 15 yrs getting $400 a week. I’m talking past college age. 30 year olds making 2k a month  pushing paprers and changing diapers and happy (?) about it. I put the question mark there because it’s hard for me to see that as happiness. I’d say it’s more bliss. Blissfully unaware of the world of opportunities out there. Of course there are challenges, but that’s part of the thrill of pursuing dreams. But many of these people have no ambition, no creativity. Its so hard to find religious people who are well rounded. The ones practicing religion are often closed minded, and the ones who aren’t anymore, only know how to drink and go to hooka bars. Of course there are different types of religious people, and I’m referring mainly to those in the Yeshivish circles or the Brooklyn types. Not to stereo type…

This same friend of mine told me it was tough to just start acting as a kid, because her parents would’ve simply cut her off financially. Personally I’m trying to set myself up financially, so that I wont be left hanging out to dry….and I’m not talking about my balls.

But again, I’ll stress, the main reason is simply because I’m doing what I love, and if not for that, I wouldn’t be involved in it at all.






All throughout my early innocent childhood years I repeatedly heard people talk about what happens if you find yourself walking down the street when you suddenly realize your Armani suit pants contain wool and linen.

As some of you may know, such an article of clothing is prohibited according to Jewish Law. This Law is known as a Chok, which means we don’t know the reason for it.

Blindly following some random obscure law isn’t a favorite pasttime of mine, but even less savory would be to pants myself in public. You see, the prohibition against wearing clothing containing wool and linen is considered so severe, whereupon discovering that the pants you are wearing are made of illegal material, one must remove them immediately.

Every time this law and consequential scenario were brought up, an argument ensued, where the frummies insisted they would definitely comply, and the rest of us said the frummies wouldn’t. We of course never would. Nor would we believe that the person we considered our sane classmate would either. I can just see the story in the papers “Yeshiva student arrested after publicly removing his pants…”

Seriously? Does any sane person actually believe God wants you to remove your pants in public to avoid wearing wool and linen? I find it hard to believe he even cares! As a German friend of mine exclaimed upon hearing the laws of Shatnez “So if you rape someone you go to hell, if you wear a linen suit…its EPIC HELL for you!”

I mean if embarrasing someone else in public is like killing someone, shouldn’t embarrassing yourself in public be something along the lines of suicide? I know it isn’t but the absurdity of it all kinda speaks for itself.

I think I’ll open a clothing line for women, say wool skirts. At a certain time, maybe right after shul when all the women are congregated yapping about god knows what, I’ll announce that theres some linen in there too. It”ll be like Improv Everywhere’s No Pants Subway Ride. Party on.

Some more reasons a Yeshiva Bochur may strip in public:

1. He realized his shirt wasn’t completely white – it had faint blue lines.

2. He realized his shirt was actually clean and not wrinkled.

3. His pants weren’t mirrors yet. One’s pants must be very shiny to be considered a top bochur.

4. He realized his pants weren’t black. Grey won’t do – he’d have to go to one of those more modern Yeshivos for that- maybe Chaim Berlin.

For a Bais Yaakov girl:

1. Her stockings had a seam. If you’re chassidish it’d be because they had no seam.

2. Skirt is too long. A skirt that goes past the “3 inches above the ankle line” is flary and may give Bachurim hard-ons. Better be accused of forgetting to put one on then buying one that you shouldn’t.

3. Neckline plunges way to low. I’m talking some serious collarbone action here.

4. Her shirt was tight enough to realize she had boobs larger than an A cup. Not that there’s anything wrong with A cups.

5. If she is married:

Hot chanie: realizes she’s wearing a snood in public, removes it.

Chassid: she realizes her hat on top of her shaitel blew off,


or perhaps she had playboy bunnies on her head and realized it, unlike this woman...


so removed it, revealing her shiny bald scalp. Sexy. Better people should thing she’s a single woman with alopecia or god forbid something worse, than be caught without that double covering. (If they’d just not shave their heads, maybe one covering would be enough?)


I guess she was wearing Shatnez too. You can see the joy of doing a good deed just shining from her holy face.


I think one of my biggest issues with the Yeshivish world, and in part the religious world in general, is they love suppressing independent thought and creativity.

I walked into my family’s Sukka the other day for dinner. My 4 year old nephew looks at me, and exclaims “Hey why you not wearing Shabbos clothes?!” I understand my sister wants to instill certain values in her children, but isn’t there a right way to do that? If the child will assume their way is the only way and anyone else is the different one, isn’t that wrong?

I understand she wants her child to believe firmly in the values she holds so true and important, but can’t we save the “musts and must nots” for things more important than the clothes you prefer your child to wear on Chol Hamoed??

I find it scary that her 4 year old child is that narrow minded. In fact I hadn’t thought children that young could be narrow minded.

Sitting in a recent computer class I noticed how the the many of the Yeshivish students could barely use the most basic functions of Word. Their was one Chassidish guy who didn’t know how to highlight a word! After all, why would they ever be interested in computers?? Learning is what’s important and that’s it!

Ever notice how an absurd amount of Frum people work in Accounting, Real Estate, or nursing homes? That’s because they aren’t interested in a particular field. They aren’t interested in anything in particular. That’s kinda scary too.

Thankfully I find myself very strongly interested in a number of fields, yet i still harbor resentment towards my parents, for had things been different growing up I probably would have been alot further along the path I am pursuing. But can’t live in the past can I?

Sometimes I feel as if I’m surrounded by people who are about as delusional as delusional can be. This contractor was just in my house, Jewish guy, as he’s leaving he gives one of those pseudo-sighs and starts babbling about how moshiach is on his way it must be! Quoted some Rabbi who supposedly has a direct line to God who said “Moshiach is closer than you may think”. Something about there being so much death in the world, it can only mean he’s coming. My mom agreed and nodded in agreement.

In 1939 they said the same thing! 1492, Crusades, Inquisition! They all said Moshiach was coming then. He hasn’t come.  My mom responded ” but hopefully that was the chevlei moshiach and out grandparents died because of that”. The contractor answered, “Do you believe Moshiach is coming? Well, then we have to prepare!”

I burst out laughing. Hasn’t ANYONE ever told these people Santa was fake?! Poor deprived guy. I’m not saying definitively whether he does or doesn’t exist. I’m saying to cling to the thought he is coming with such conviction, when in fact he doesn’t know for sure is childish.

His then went onto the economy being bad. Firstly, tough shit. I also have no money. Secondly ever heard of the Great Depression?? He insisted today is worse. “In the 1930’s the economy was bad, and it became good. Today we don’t know what’s going on!” Yea, hindsight is always 20/20. My mom said something about it being bad globally, but in the 30’s it was only in the US. Never new the Messiah was so picky.

It could be his life is hard and this is what gives him hope, but to tell others about your fantasy is kinda weird. Almost like he’s trying to convince me. He was spouting on automatic. Spouting. Like a robot repeating stuff.

He sounded like a desperate man trying to say “but he IS real isn’t he? Right?” Like he knew it’s bullshit but, clinging onto the fairytale of his fantasy he remains steadfast in what he made into his belief. Like that’ll convince me.

For those of you who wonder why I post erratically, the answer is quite simple- I don’t LOOK for things to post. I let the inspiration of the moment speak for itself. Similar to when I cook- I figure out basically what I want to make, say a stir-fry, and the I let the food speak to me. Sounds crazy, I know. But that’s how I work.

Well, I just had a beer and was sitting watching Nip-Tuck, when Dr. Troy mentioned about swearing off drinking and then waking up with a hangover. It hit me at that moment- quite in a similar way to when I was at my friends place on Fire Island and the absurdity of religion hit me as I watched real normal American life unfold in front of me – when the word drinking was said in a very innocent way. Let me begin with the following.

I never really drank, even on Purim, until I was maybe in 12th grade or even older. I went to Israel, and by the time I came back I was fast becoming not religious. Shortly thereafter as I mentioned I began working in Manhattan. Grabbing drinks after work on Stone Street- you gotta check that place out- became commonplace, as did coming home drunk on Thursday, Friday, Saturday or Sunday nights, more often than not at least two of those. My mom looked at drinking like  an unbelievable evil. Even on Purim, when all other people I knew got shitfaced I always felt uncomfortable taking a drink in high school. So you can imagine at this point my mom wasn’t thrilled. Now they weren’t – still aren’t – the type of people to say anything to me, but I knew my mom looked at drinking on the weekends like an unbelievably irresponsible and sad thing.

Just recently I went away with some friends. I took the family car and loaded it up with some beers for the road. Not for the road literally but for when we stopped driving for the night. We didn’t end up drinking at all so I unloaded the beers from the car when I got home and brought them into my room. Inadvertently I left one bottle in the car. My mom found it and went ballistic, assuming I take to drinking while driving. Now I can assure you that I do no such thing. If I so much as had a beer I won’t drive for a long while, to be sure all the alcohol is out of my system. I calmed her down and life went on.

Ok, so what hit me was the following. Here’s my mom, and many people in the Jewish community, who assume that drinking is evil. Yet on Purim most seem to have no problem. Yes, there are calls for being safe, and some call for not drinking at all. But the overwhelming feeling people have about Purim is that it’s OK to drink. My mom feels one can drink on Purim, but drinking any other time of the year is completely immature. Now who the hell made that bullshit up? Just because YOU decide to go along with the rest of the largely pathetic Frum community and drink on Purim, doesn’t mean that day is any different than others. Who made up that drinking on Purim is ok, and only once a year??

At least my mom herself never drinks. But my dad drinks on Purim and has a shot or two or three at the Shabbos meal and yet still tells of the “horrors” of Yeshiva guys drinking at weddings. Who the fuck doesn’t drink at weddings??

Now I’m not an alcoholic.  Far from it, but social drinking that doesn’t interrupt your life, nor do you feel that not drinking will ruin that night, is perfectly acceptable. And to suggest otherwise, while condoning drinking on YOUR holiday is the talk of asinine and pathetic hypocrites.

Personally, I find that there’s nothing like a few drinks to get both parties interested and loosened up…so can I buy you a drink?