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We’re raising $ for the show I’m on , Coversity. Any help would be appreciated. http://www.indiegogo.com/Coversity-the-Series

When Did Woohoo! Become a Word?

Your local WaMu Bank Teller

I remember the day quite vividly. I was walking past a WaMu Bank and noticed a sign announcing what mustv’e been good news. The sign read something like “WOOHOO! Get $200 when signing up for a WaMu account today!”.

Wait.

Did they just say WOOHOO!?

My potential financial institution, the people responsible for safeguarding my finances, saying WOOHOO! like some skinny drunkard with tattered shorts running down the alleyway, cracked beer bottle in his hand, yelling WOOHOO! I knocked that guy in the bar out but good!

Besides, what’s the logic of signing up to get $200? I should sign up with a bunch of adult-children who will surely make paper airplanes out of my money, because they hide behind a colorful sign and a cheap suit they bought at Goodwill?

Not that I have anything against Goodwill.

At all.

I’m sure they do wonderful things for the children of Africa.

Or is that the Red Cross?

Oh, and did I mention, the WaMU sign had a bird on it. A little yellow BIRD. Now HOW is a bird going to convince me to sign away my life to WaMu?

Besides who the hell decided to give a bank a nickname??

My nephew gets a nickname. My dog gets a nickname.

It’s cute.

My BANK does not need a nickname. I do NOT want my bank sounding cute.

I shudder thinking about the marketing team meeting that went into the development of the WOOHOO! I imagine some guy, definitely in a crumpled suit, possibly having not showered that morning after having slept on the couch all night because his wife kicked him out. Which brings me to another point about who gives her the right to do so. It’s probably his house anyway, she should just stay in the kitchen making sammiches all day. But that’s another story.

Back to our meeting. So Mr. Crumples suit, yawning, gets up in front of 10 people, probably all interns, and blurts out the phrase his one year old son was making all night long –  WOO-HOO!

So the young interns, being over eager and burning to succeed in the glamorous world of the WaMu tellers, write down on their note pads “WOOHOO!”

And then Mr. Crumpled Suit farts and promptly falls asleep.

Of Boring Jobs, Hot Bosses, and Yeshiva Memories

NOW THAT I AM NO LONGER AT THE PLACE OF EMPLOYMENT ABOUT WHICH THIS POST WAS WRITTEN I CAN FINALLY POST THIS AGAIN. LAST TIME I HAD IT UP FOR 10 MINUTES THEN CHANGED MY MIND. LIKE I SAID – I STARTED A BETTER NEW JOB A FEW DAYS AGO.

The last year and a half I was in Yeshiva I was constantly jumpy. Couldn’t sit still for a moment. There was a reason behind it, but one of the reasons was I simply hated what I was doing. Besides doing nothing. I mean there were interesting times, we did crazy stuff…

I started working a few months ago as a real estate agent while I’m in school, figured it was better than flipping burgers, so to speak.

It was. I got to meet and become friends with some of the most amazing people. I got to know one of America’s most popular TV stars. Met two of the biggest names in Hollywood styling and son of one of the 3 big Cable companies. Another guy I met was a founder of Skype, another woman a  founder of an extremely high end woman’s accessories company. Another guy was probably the most popular actor of the 60’s. The list goes on a bit more. Most of these people I met while showing them stupidly expensive Manhattan apartments. Fun times.

A short while later I went on to be the Human Resources Manager; it afforded me steady income, however small. One day while sitting in my office I overheard one of the agents mention she was looking for an assistant. I approached her, found out she could pay me more, and began working for her. Actually I began not working for her. Let me explain.

This woman knows how to meet people and has her hand in a few multi million dollar deals involving the big players. She’s kind of playing office tho. She never really made too much money herself. Everything she asks me to get done I make sure to take care of. Thing is sometimes there simply is jack shit to do. I can spend 6 out of the 8.5 hours at work blogging, killing time on Facebook, or reading up on whatever. And then I get my paycheck at the end of the week. Her money is all family money; between her boyfriend and Dad, she’s well covered. 

Sounds like the life. Get to do nothing and get paid for it. Well it isn’t. It’s intensely boring and extremely depressing. I’m not depressed, don’t get me wrong. I have my hobbies, my goals, my friends, and am in school. But I think it’s time to actively look for another job.

I mean,  there are things I need the money for. As I mentioned I’m working on a project which requires me to have a private coach once a week. That costs. Cell phones, going out with friends, clothing, vacations etc. all cost money. But it’s gotten too boring.  I feel like I’m back in Yeshiva, what with sitting in one spot the whole day doing absolutely nothing…

And with America being the way it is until I graduate, I’ll have a hard time finding a job. Which is silly, because although I value education, and am pursuing multiple degrees and skills, half the jobs out there can be done by anyone with decent intelligence and a desire to succeed.

I do believe that creativity …

and your own style…

can get you far in life.

So of course I hope my boss isn’t reading this. If she is, she might fire me. For what? I dunno. I get everything done that needs to be done, thing is she simply doesn’t have things to get done. Either way I wouldn’t mind all that much. It’d be like getting in a fight with the Rosh Yeshiva. See, because she, like the Rosh Yeshiva, have titles, and are undeserving of having them. Difference is, she’s a good person and the last Rosh Yeshiva I had, wasn’t.

** as mentioned I no longer work there. My new job will hopefully be far more interesting and innovative- not to mention financially rewarding…